What should I be when I grow up?
Okay, please excuse my freak-out rant.
I feel really overwhelmed. I feel like I need to decide today. A lot of grad school deadlines are only 2 weeks away, and I'm at the edge of the acceptable time to ask professors to write letters of recommendation. And I'm not sure what I want to apply for grad school in, if I should get a masters or just take leveling classes before a doctorate, when to apply, aaaaagh! My head feels like it's about to explode!!!! Do I do leveling courses first and then apply a year later? And if I have to apply next fall, will I even have enough leveling classes and research experience to get accepted to the programs I really want to be in? I also keep vacillating between things I'd like to do. For instance, I came downstairs to research grad school for clinical psychology, but then I started thinking about Ph.D.s in anthropology, but I feel so unsure about whether I'd actually like those jobs because I've never experienced them. And will I get to experience them before it's too late? Like with Deaf Ed, I never worked with Deaf kids til my SENIOR YEAR, and was practically finished with the program before I realized I didn't want to do it anymore. AAAAGH!
Edit: Phew, I'm feeling much better now. Still stressed a bit, but my parents and I talked and decided it would probably be the best plan to take leveling classes next fall and see what I like the best. Then I can have more time to prepare, and not feel like I'm launching into this vast unknown. But this time of life can be so exciting and so stressful. I hope I can downplay the stress and mostly just enjoy uncertainties more than worry over them.
2 comments:
Take a deep breath. You do not need to decide today.
From my own experience, applying for a doctoral program takes a lot of effort and preparation. If you're not sure that you want to apply, you're probably not going to be able to throw things together in two weeks. My two cents is that at this point in the game, you should either take more courses or apply for a masters.
There's nothing that says the you have to figure out your ultimate career at 22. There's nothing that says that you must graduate school as soon as your get your bachelor's degree.
Whatever you do will be something you love, something you're passionate about, and if you start it next year, great. If it takes a couple of years before it gets started for you, then that'll be great too. I know that this will all work out.
Gosh, that's a lot to think about. I hope to talk to you on the phone about all this whenever you have a chance. I like everything you said in your "Edit." I really pray that you can downplay the worry, as you said. These things have a way of working themselves out, sometimes better than we could have planned. Just keep going toward where you feel peace.
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